I arranged a blogger event, but nobody came

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My whole life is a cringe column entry. Did I ever tell you about the time I arranged a blogger event and nobody turned up? Yeah, this title wasn’t click bait. Prepare to cringe.

I haven’t blogged in months, I haven’t been on instagram since July; in fact my entire social media presence has also been sporadic at best. I’ve been hiding in shame. You know what it’s time for? My favourite time – pity party time.

I do self-depreciation really well, so here it goes.

Last year I arranged a blogger event in Manchester that went really well, so naturally I thought “HECK YES – let’s do it again.”

I wanted to organise a little charity blogger get-together and published the idea on some of my favourite blogger Facebook groups. A charity pub quiz seemed like a good idea. Booze, prizes and glory for the winner. Who wouldn’t love that?

The post had a great initial response. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t expect every single person to be able to attend just after I posted the idea, but it showed me that people were interested in the concept.

Fulled by the great feedback, I got to work arranging a venue and prizes.

That’s right. I actually managed to find brands to collaborate with, before things went south. How embarrassing.

In the run up to the event I had a decent sized mailing list of bloggers who had agreed to go. 70+ from the local area. This wasn’t the people who originally said it sounded like a good idea, this was a list of people who knew the date, time, venue and said they could definitely attend. I’m a realistic kind of girl, I expected around 20 to turn up like my last event.

In the few days before the event I was tweeting like mad about it. People were signing up to attend late, saying they were really excited to go. I had even told the venue how many people had signed up to attend and showed them a few examples of the hype on Facebook.

I should also mention I made the best effort to arrange a central location and a time to suit everyone. You can’t please them all – but I bloody tried.

I had my boyfriend there to help me set up and carry the prizes to the event. The bar was empty when I got there, but I came super early to set up. Time passed by and no one turned up. I thought, maybe people were just going to be fashionably late… oh how wrong I was.

My good friend Hannah turned up to spur me on, but I think even she was a little concerned by the fact it was just me and her in the venue. A short while later one other lovely blogger, Rebecca, arrived.

I kept saying “well, let’s just give it ten more minutes.” Fucking hell, what a cringe bag – I should know when to quit!

We tried to make it as least awkward as possible, but you can’t really host a pub quiz to a party of two people. It was the most cringeworthy experience of my life. Which is a strong statement to make because my life is a calamity.

At the time, I felt like I couldn’t blog about this experience without pissing people off, without offending local bloggers and without sounding like the world’s biggest Bitter Betty.

But here I am a few months later – still stewing.

Since distancing myself from blogging, I feel like I have every right to complain about this! I went out of my way to do something good for you guys. I organised prizes and a venue – I have been too embarrassed to contact their marketing team and tell them what happened.

People complain that bloggers are ignored in Manchester, but shit like this is the reason why.

Whilst I can laugh now, this whole thing completely knocked my confidence. I can deal with no shows – but for every single attendee to bail really does show the lack of community spirit in the ‘bloggersphere‘. Not one person emailed me to say ‘sorry I couldn’t attend’ – they didn’t even have the decency to make up an excuse!

We ended up raising £6 for Oxfam and I’m really grateful to the girls for their kind donations. As gutting as it is, that’s at least one positive from the situation.

Call me petty, but I just had to get this off my chest.

So at least you know why I haven’t really been blogging since then. I start to write a post but feel too embarrassed and cringey to even think about blogging. Call it nerves, pride, whatever; I just don’t think I want to be associated with blogging anymore.

✌️ Anyway I’m just ranting now, so I’m just going to leave this here. Peace out.

**Oh and if that wasn’t cringe worthy enough – here’s some of my most embarrassing moments.

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75 Comments

  1. November 21, 2016 / 4:31 pm

    SO unfortunate and I’m sorry you went through this. Organising anything isn’t easy especially a blogging event. Blogging has changed a great deal, I don’t even know what some bloggers expect now or what goes through their minds but sometimes you do find the silver lining with blogging. Everything has it’s pros and cons. The fact nobody apologised would grate me and make me also think twice. You shouldn’t feel embarrassed but I understand why you do, unfortunately I suppose it means nothing to the others who let you down to begin with.

  2. Nicola
    November 21, 2016 / 4:35 pm

    Oh no, this sounds awful – but I’m glad you can laugh about it now! It’s so disheartening when things like this happen. Such a shame no one bothered to tell you they weren’t going to be making it

    Nicola // pink-confetti.co.uk

  3. November 21, 2016 / 4:38 pm

    Oh no you poor thing! But good on you for trying to do something for the blogging community in the first place, and for not letting it put you off blogging for life. I’m sure the people who let you down will feel much more cringe when they read this, small mercies hey! I think you’re writing style is bloody brilliant so please keep going. I’m sorry to say I was laughing, pretty hard most of the way through your post because you have such a good “voice” and the humour really came across. I gave ,myself a slap at the end though (promise)
    Stay chipper, what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. ✌

    • Admin
      Author
      November 21, 2016 / 6:03 pm

      No honestly I’m so glad you can laugh! That’s honestly the biggest compliment. I didn’t want to come across too sour about the whole thing… Even though I totally am, haha!
      Thanks for the pick me up Amellia!

  4. Dannii
    November 21, 2016 / 4:56 pm

    So sorry to hear that this happened, but at least you had the guts to give it a try!

  5. November 21, 2016 / 4:58 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear this! That’s so bad that no-one turned up, and sorry to hear it’s put you off staying in the blogging community x

  6. November 21, 2016 / 6:40 pm

    Oh gosh what a shame 🙁 this would be my total worry if I ever did something like this, I can’t believe no one came though that is madness!

  7. November 21, 2016 / 7:04 pm

    I read this with an open mouth! I really can’t believe that only 1 person turned up when it had so much hype. I think it’s rude if someone says they are going then just not turn up, unless they have a really good reason. All that effort and time you [put in to organise it. Such a shame, I always thought the blogging community where really good at supporting each other, not letting each other down.

    I am so glad you can look back and laugh about it now, If it was me I think I would have been in tears for weeks

  8. November 21, 2016 / 7:48 pm

    I feel awful that this happened. I grew up in Manchester and would have come if I didn’t live in Germany now. I’m trying to attend events here but my terrible German makes things quite embarrassing if it makes you feel any better.

  9. Jolina
    November 21, 2016 / 8:17 pm

    Oh no. Sorry that happened to you. Good on you for being able to laugh about it now. I must say it’s awful that nobody let you know they wouldn’t be able to come….Hope you don’t give up though. Hope you keep at it. Maybe 3rd time’s the charm.

  10. November 21, 2016 / 9:11 pm

    I’m sorry this happened to you. It must have been so frustrating after all the effort you went to. Jo x

  11. November 21, 2016 / 9:33 pm

    Oh my goodness what a shame, I can not believe no one turned up. It’s such a shame that all organised it all then people didnt show without even an apology.

  12. November 21, 2016 / 10:10 pm

    Its not petty at all hun, really sorry that all these people signed up and noone came , that is disgraceful. If you ever come to London I would definitely turn up. Shame that it happened xx

  13. November 21, 2016 / 10:25 pm

    Jessica this is HORRIBLE!! I had this happen to me once for my baby shower (people who were actually supposed to be friends 🙁 just called and said they couldn’t come!) and it’s the reason I won’t have a big 30th. I’m too far away to justify a little event in Manchester but still. That SUCKS.

  14. Tara
    November 21, 2016 / 10:34 pm

    This is why I would never organise an event, sorry this happened!

  15. November 21, 2016 / 10:37 pm

    I actually can’t believe what I just read, after all your efforts and no one came I would honestly be so mad. All I can say is the people who said they were coming now have to live with this on their conscious once they read your post and see how selfish they were. I’m so sorry that it happened to you xxx

  16. Fatima
    November 21, 2016 / 11:02 pm

    Oh my God! That is SO SO bad. I am sorry you had to do so much to arrange the event and no one turned up.

  17. November 22, 2016 / 5:27 am

    ohhhhhhh 🙁 this is pretty sad, why they didn’t come.

  18. November 22, 2016 / 10:03 am

    Wow I can’t believe no one showed up. That is so wrong. I don’t usually attend events but if they gave their word and didn’t show up or apologise for not coming, then you have every right to be pissed.

  19. November 22, 2016 / 10:16 am

    I feel so bad for you that no one turned up, I can’t believe that that many people had said they would but didn’t. You did your absolute best and you could not have done anything more so don’t beat yourself up about it x

  20. November 22, 2016 / 12:53 pm

    Oh no sounds awful. I can’t believe that many didn’t turn up when said they would. It’s definitely not being petty as u obviously put a lot of time and effort into it.

  21. November 22, 2016 / 2:09 pm

    I feel so bad for you hun, all that effort, time and trouble and yeah… I would be fuming too x

  22. November 22, 2016 / 3:09 pm

    You have every right to be angry and upset but this reflects badly on the people who let you down. I can’t believe people didn’t even bother to let you know their plans had changed, so selfish.

  23. November 22, 2016 / 6:43 pm

    I think you have every reason to be angry and upset, I know I would be, especially after everyone knew the work you had put in and said they were going to attend. Am so sorry this happened x

  24. November 22, 2016 / 7:43 pm

    I am so f**king angry to read about this. I am so sorry this happened 🙁

  25. November 22, 2016 / 8:04 pm

    Oh my goodness babe ! PLEASE arrange another one. I will personally help you plan it xx

    http://Www.j-Anne.co

    Xx

  26. November 22, 2016 / 8:08 pm

    This happened to me too. I organised a lunch in Manchester and even got a huge discount on the food for everyone yet only 1 person showed up. Like what happened to you, hardly any of the invited bloggers told me before hand that they couldn’t attend, so I ended up just sitting there on my own – even worse was that they PR company was waiting for the reviews. Has totally put me off organising anything again and it just shows that there are events that happen for Manchester bloggers, if they actually attend!

  27. November 22, 2016 / 8:13 pm

    I’m so sorry this happened. I’m still a relatively new blogger, but I’ve noticed Manchester bloggers seem to slip under the radar, especially in terms of events. I understand your embarrassment but so glad you spoke about it. People may not have even thought twice – probably assuming because of the hype that them not attending wouldn’t make a difference. I hope people learn from this. I hope you also gain some confidence back in time. Xx

  28. November 22, 2016 / 8:17 pm

    I shouldn’t have laughed at this as it’s awful but girl your writing is hilarious!! Now humour aside, that’s awful. I’m so sorry this happened. I am a manchester blogger and I would have come!

    • Admin
      Author
      November 23, 2016 / 3:31 pm

      That’s a good thing! I was hoping people could laugh at my expense – weirdly enough. You have to laugh, if not, it would really get to you.
      Don’t feel bad for laughing, hopefully I don’t sound like such a Bitter Betty!

  29. November 22, 2016 / 8:21 pm

    This made me so sad reading this, I can’t believe no-one showed up! I’m based in Manchester and I didn’t hear about this event (I’m not very on the ball with keeping an eye out for them) and I wish I had. So frustrating that people can be so inconsiderate!

  30. November 22, 2016 / 8:24 pm

    Oh my goodness. I’ve never read your blog before, but I can imagine how awful this must have been for you. I would be really angry as well! I’m so sorry this happened. I promise that if you ever organise anything else, I will 100% be there (or just for a coffee if you don’t feel like organising anything else) x

    alicered.co.uk

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      Author
      November 23, 2016 / 3:37 pm

      Alice that is honestly so nice of you to say! I’ve followed yo on Blog lovin, it’s so nice to come across another local blogger.
      Who knows, I might get back in my blogging seat again. Writing this seems to have dislodged my bloggers block a bit!

  31. November 22, 2016 / 8:57 pm

    🙁 I’m a Manchester parent blogger and was literally the only blogger to turn up at a Body Shop event in the Trafford centre earlier this year. They’d had over 60 confirmed attendees and only 10 contacted them to apologise ahead of the event. I felt awful for them. I am telling you this so you know its not you! I never RSVP unless I’m certain I can attend – this means I rarely accept any invites as having 2 young kids makes it a logistical nightmare lol. Sorry for the ramble. I hope that if you don’t come back to blogging, you find another hobby you love just as much xx

    • Admin
      Author
      November 23, 2016 / 10:03 am

      That’s honestly mental! Don’t get me wrong, you’d expect maybe a few drop outs, maybe some getting stuck in traffic on the way to Trafford – but for like 60 people to NOT turn up is just crazy. I’m sure the Body Shop were extremely grateful for you being there. I think instore events are my fav cause you get to buy the things you try, so it’s confusing that people would change their mind and bail.
      Yeah I feel really dramatic saying it’s put me off blogging, but it really has. I’ll just have to start a Youtube channel instead ha!

  32. November 22, 2016 / 9:18 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear about your experience! How could anyone confirm and didn’t show up! Glad that you wrote this post. It would be a perfect slap for all those who signed for your event and didn’t show up.
    I’d also suggest you to not give your passion for blogging and just let it go whatever happened! Just take it as an important learning in your life!

  33. denajayne
    November 22, 2016 / 10:17 pm

    I’m gutted this happened to you, I would never give word and then not turn up! xo

  34. November 22, 2016 / 10:51 pm

    I am so sorry this happened. How awful. Well done you for giving it a go though. People just can be so unreliable, it sucks!

  35. November 23, 2016 / 1:26 am

    OH MY GOSH!!!! I feel so bad for you!!!! Im so sorry this happened 🙁 You have every right to sit here and complain – like you said, you organised something great for other people and everyone just bailed – not even a message or anything to let you know. Some people just don’t understand how much time and effort goes into organising events. I hope after expressing this now, you can get back into blogging xx

  36. November 23, 2016 / 1:59 am

    I cannot imagine how devastating that must have been. Nothing worst than putting yourself out there and becoming vulnerable and have that blow up in your face. I am glad you had the courage to share. Maybe this will give you an opportunity to go forward. Failure is only really a failure if you never try again.

  37. November 23, 2016 / 8:35 am

    I’m truly gutted for you. I’d assumed that your event had happened and been awesome and I am always quite jealous that I can’t make these things because of the kids. It annoys the hell out of me when people don’t cancel – it’s simply polite, especially if food and drink or anything else is being arranged. I have been to a blogger event organised by a brand in Manchester and found I was one of only two people there. I don’t know if it’s exclusive to Manchester or UK wide, but people just don’t think of others at all. Don’t let it put you off blogging – although maybe it really is fair it’s put you off bloggers!

    • Admin
      Author
      November 23, 2016 / 9:58 am

      One of two for a brand event? That’s crazy.
      A lot of people said to me ‘if it was a brand giving freebies people would have attended‘ but I don’t believe that. I think people just love the idea of blogging & being a part of the community, but they can’t be arsed with it really when it comes down to it. Your story just goes to prove that.
      I actually work for a brand inhouse now and I dread to think of something like this happening to one of their events.

  38. November 23, 2016 / 9:20 am

    Oh blimey that is just awful. I’m gutted for you. It sounds like you put a lot of time and effort in and for people to not show is disgusting. I’m glad to can laugh about it now as the bad feelings are not good for you. I would definitely turn up to one of your events even though I’ve never been to a blogging meet up or event in my life.
    Sending lots of positive love to you xx
    Ps I’m only in Warrington so can always whiz over to Manchester

    • Admin
      Author
      November 23, 2016 / 9:54 am

      Thanks for the pep talk Siena! I’ve just followed you on Blog lovin’, lovely to find another local(ish) blogger. Yeah I can definitely laugh now – I think I have to!

  39. Francesca
    November 23, 2016 / 2:24 pm

    Oh man I’m so sorry no one came to your event I imagine it took a lot of planning too!! I’d definitley had been there if Inlived closer I promise!!

  40. November 23, 2016 / 3:23 pm

    OH bless you!! How awful! It is horrible when people promise to attend things and don’t turn up without even a word, but it is even worse when you have put so much heart and effort into it. I am sorry this happened to you 🙁

  41. November 23, 2016 / 7:05 pm

    I’m so sorry this happened to you 🙁 This happened to me a few months ago! It can be so discouraging and really sucks when you make so much effort! Don’t let it get you down!

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      Author
      November 23, 2016 / 8:45 pm

      No way, I’m gutted to hear this happened to you too Shannon! I don’t get why people leave us hanging. The blogging community is supposedly the complete opposite of what we’ve experience, but I beg to differ.

  42. November 23, 2016 / 8:31 pm

    hahaha, it’s sand, I know, but it’s also funny, specially at the start of the post and seeing the image, but yep, I can understand why you didn’t feel to keep blogging, but I hope you do 🙂

  43. November 23, 2016 / 9:22 pm

    Woow I am absolutely shocked by this, it must have been so hard for you. I can’t believe that no one bothered to even apologise. Some bloggers are so high on themselves and spoiled with free stuff without them lifting a finger. It sounded like a brilliant idea for an event I would definitely come, if not I would give you an apology if I coudn’t attend. I am sorry you had to experience that! It’s sad that it made you give up blogging :/ I send you a hug!

  44. November 23, 2016 / 11:32 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear that it’s such a shame that no one came with the amount of effort you went through to organise the event.

  45. November 24, 2016 / 2:29 am

    Ah no, I’m so so sorry this happened! I cannot believe people gave the word then didn’t show – how abysmal?!

  46. Hannah
    November 24, 2016 / 11:08 am

    So sorry this happened! I’m disappointed in the bloggers that didn’t attend when they said they would!

  47. Cassandra Mayers
    November 25, 2016 / 10:47 am

    oh no thats terrible. Well hun! Next year im going to be moving from the Big City of London to small town of burnley near manchester, and after being used to such a fast pace life here im worried i will be bored! So if you ever decide to do one again, I will be there! Im also not the sort of person to no show , really angers me when people do that!

  48. November 27, 2016 / 11:37 pm

    Well, that was truly an experience to remember, but, not repeat. That is the downside of social media invites, people will sign up with no real intention on showing up. Such a crappy deal to be dealt. btw, the meme’s are ‘spot on’ 🙂

  49. suchi
    December 8, 2016 / 12:16 am

    so sorry for what happened! don’t let others pull your spirit down! things happen, but done let stop you from doing what u love to do! so keep blogging!:)

  50. hannah
    January 4, 2017 / 5:47 pm

    That is absolutely awful. You went to all that hard work to organize it and not one had the decency to turn up or at least cancel. If I was based in Manchester I definately would have came if i was free. And I mean it too, if i say i coming to an event i will actually make it and if i have to cancel i will let the organizer know

  51. July 9, 2017 / 1:51 am

    I’ve only just seen this and I’m torn. I think it’s awful that no-one turned up but the way you wrote this post had me laughing too. Love self-deprecating humour.

  52. October 20, 2017 / 1:14 pm

    I was gritting my teeth just reading this, I’ve been dying to go to blogger events and for no one to show up it’s just bloody rude isn’t it! I’m so sorry that you were let down like this, I can’t imagine what it did to your confidence x

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      Author
      October 20, 2017 / 1:27 pm

      I know it’s so cringe isn’t it, Rebecca!? I think that’s what annoyed me the most at the time because there are loads of bloggers who complain that no events are held up North. There are people who don’t get the chance to go, yet when someone goes out of their way to arrange something they just bail.

  53. October 20, 2017 / 2:03 pm

    OMG… I’m sorry you had to go through that. Just trying to imagine me in that situation, makes me cringe. I never understood why people just can’t RSVP on time, and then actually come if they said they will come. Also, if something comes up, why can’t they just send an e-mail and apologise? It would be a normal thing to do.

    xoxo Sienna

  54. October 20, 2017 / 2:24 pm

    Oh that’s horrible you poor thing! The cheek of these people. Such a shame it’s put you off blogging.

  55. October 20, 2017 / 8:19 pm

    Omg! This is awful, but I’m glad you are able to laugh about it. If I was in Manchester I would have definitely came 😉

  56. October 20, 2017 / 9:11 pm

    OMG this is just shocking.
    I’m stunned and embarrassed

    If I commit to something I turn up 99% of the time and on the small chance the kids are ill or something comes up I’ll always email. It’s just good manners.
    So sorry this happened to you

  57. October 20, 2017 / 9:21 pm

    Awwwn, the whole thing sounds awful and I find the whole situation like, so ridiculous but so sad at the same time 🙁
    But I’m sure, all the effort you put in that event shows how much you care for the things done the right way possible and that will pay out in the next event you arrange, for sure!!!

    Best wishes, and don’t get that unfortunate event stop you from arranging new things <3
    Amanda

  58. October 20, 2017 / 9:49 pm

    i’m really sorry to hear that! It must suck to put all the effort into this and have high expectations and get this result in the end. 🙁

  59. October 21, 2017 / 10:21 am

    Holy shit that’s awful.
    But it’s also sad – what kind of person says he/she’ll come and then doesn’t show up or at least apologizes for that?!

  60. October 21, 2017 / 6:37 pm

    I just came across this post on Facebook, I’m so sorry to hear that this happened and it must have gotten you rather down, I know all of us would if we were in the same situation. However, the past is in the past and best not to let it get to you anymore, move on from it. You have a great blog and keep being lovely, don’t let negativity or bad situations pull you back from moving forward 🙂

    Lots of love,

    Laura xo

  61. October 22, 2017 / 9:58 am

    So sorry this happened! I hope you eventually feel confident blogging again. Your writing style is so funny xx

    -Jacqueline

  62. Bookinggoodread
    October 24, 2017 / 8:48 pm

    I’m sorry this happened to you, I’m a new blogger from Liverpool, I haven’t been lucky enough yet to be invited to any kind of blogging event but if I was and I couldn’t attend for any reason I would let them now, I wouldn’t let it dishearten you to much though. I love your style of writing as well so direct and to the point

  63. November 10, 2017 / 1:10 pm

    Oh gosh… I wonder why they did that? There must be an explanation! A couple or some people it’s ok, but all of them??! Anyways it’s a shame I don’t live near you, otherwise I would have been there for real. I am in Italy, Sicily to be exact, and in here I don’t get to go to ANY party or blogger event of some sort. I would really love to, if brands, bloggers or PR could organize events in here.

  64. February 13, 2018 / 11:13 pm

    Are bloggers your ‘target readership’? I am assuming not…if your blog was aimed at helping others bloggers grow their blog (or similar), then maybe worthy of feeling as you describe, but as it is just something you are doing alongside being a (sucessful) lifestyle blogger, you can’t let it knock your confidence as a blogger and stop blogging…some blogger meet ups you kindly organise for other bloggers may be busy, some may not … it is not your ‘core business’ / reason you are blogging…so try to not dwell on it, and focus on growing your blog if that is still your passion.

  65. February 13, 2018 / 11:15 pm

    Typo *successful* – bit tired!

  66. March 15, 2018 / 4:17 pm

    Really sorry to hear this, it’s such a shame that people don’t seem to understand the amount of hard work and time you put in making all those arrangements,, but bright side is that you over come it. You don’t have to feel embarrassed, every business has its ups , downs and failures , just take is as learning and move on brave girl. Best wishes for future post and events

  67. May 20, 2018 / 1:05 pm

    Fudging heck that sucks!! What a shame that you put such effort in having a fun, bonding experience with other bloggers and they just ghosted you. Sorry it’s made you feel so bad hun. Hopefully that will be the last crappy experience you have with bloggers
    x

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