How to leave your house when you really don’t want to

Listen, some days you don’t want to leave your bed. I get it.

In fact, sometimes it’s not just a day. Sometimes the feeling hits you for longer and here we are days later; in the same old bedding, same old sleepwear, knotted hair and all.

I get like this from time to time. No matter how much you want to leave the house you just feel like something is getting in the way. Part of us knows just a little fresh air would make us feel better, but can you really muster up the courage to leave the comfort of your flat?

Yes, you can.

You’re just going to need to build yourself up to it.

First of all – forgive yourself

You won’t get anywhere if you’re judging yourself for staying in bed. I don’t care how bad you smell or how rough you feel – you’re doing your best. You’re either going to leave the house or you’re not, it really is as simple as that. You’re not a bad person if you stay inside all day, although you might feel better if you get some air and have a shower.

Props to you for at least taking a moment to read this post and look after yourself. You’re doing a good job. Part of what’s holding you back is guilt, so the last thing you need is to shame yourself for feeling like this.

Open a window

Let’s start small by getting out of bed and opening a window. It doesn’t have to be wide open, just a crack will do. A little fresh air is bound to make you feel a more alive and listening to the sound of the outdoors can give us a welcome break from Netflix replays. Creating a vent will also help filter out dust and allergens, sprucing up your living space minimum little effort.

If you start getting a little cold, let that feeling motivate you to put on some warmer clothes. Do you see what’s happening? You’re starting to move around a little more. If you’re out of your bed at this point, I’m proud of you.

Brush your hair

It’s the small things that are going to make you feel a little better and if you’ve been indoors for a while, I bet you’re suffering from a classic bed bun. If you’re anything like me, you probably put your hair in a bun and that’s it until you need to take it back down to wash your hair. For the guys reading this, a little comb goes a long way!

Put a wash on

How amazing do fresh sheets feel? You don’t have to change your bedding right away if you don’t have the energy, but wouldn’t it be nice to have the option? Grab your old bedding and bundle it into the wash. Even just the smell of fresh bedding can be comforting, so this step is pretty important. You’re going to have two options once this step is done – continue working towards leaving the house or be productive and clean your living space.

Get dressed

Put jeans on. Put the type of clothes on that you’d wear to leave the house in. Clothes that you can’t really lounge around in. Heck, put your shoes on so you can’t even put your feet up.

Avoid distractions
You’ve come so far if you’ve got to this point, you’re doing great but there’s a chance you might get distracted and fall into a Youtube hole again. Stand up and shake off your distractions. Literally get up and wiggle if you have to, no one’s watching!

Set your intentions

You’re now starting to move around and feel a little lively. Who was that creature lurking under the covers before? It’s definitely not you; you’ve got dressed, you smell good and you’re heading out the door. Take a moment to just breathe and let the bad vibez pass. If you start to panic, take your time. You’re not on a time limit, go at your own pace.

Think of a reward

There are so many good things waiting outside. Fresh air, the feeling of accomplishment, a break from your phone but it might just be the fact that you could also buy some snacks from the corner shop. Whatever motivates you to leave, focus on it. This is what you’re working towards and since you’re up, you’ve got clothes on and I made you open your window so it’s not as cozy as it once was in your room, you may as heckin’ well leave.

But before you do, I’ve got something else to talk to you about…

A note about your health

It’s not for me to assume, but are you ok? You’ve landed on this page because you’re looking for tips to get out of bed and every time I’ve ever been in your position I’ve always felt utterly rubbish on the inside. Again, I don’t want to assume but I do feel the need to let you know that there are so many resources out there if you need help or someone to talk to.

CALM – Campaign Against Living Miserably (For men) 0800 58 58 58 or visit their webchat page

Papyrus (for people under 35) 0800 068 41 41

The Silver Line (No strict age limits but mainly speak to people over 55) 0800 4 70 80 90

Anxiety UK 03444 775 774 (Mon-Fri, 9.30am-5.30pm)

OCD UK 0845 120 3778 (Mon-Fri, 9am-5pm)

MIND 0300 123 3393 (Mon-Fri, 9am-6pm)

No Panic 0844 967 4848 (daily, 10am-10pm)

Maybe the idea of speaking to someone over the phone is a bit odd for you, but believe me it beats letting the thoughts bounce off your own bedroom walls. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, in fact reaching out to professionals is one of the bravest steps towards independence you can take.


If you’re grieving, nervous, panicking, low – whatever it is – I want you to know that those feelings will pass, but you’re going to have to be gentle with yourself.

Now step outside and embrace the day.

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