Hey, do you fancy going out? Like, ‘out out’?
If you’re anything like me, you love a night out… but hate them at the same time. It’s a constant struggle. Do I want to spend a tenner on one drink or a massive Chinese takeaway? Do I want to wallow in my own self pity with only Netflix for company or do I want a mega night out with the gals? Can I be bothered with the banging headache the next day or is it worse to wake up the next day and see insta stories of your pals having fun without you?
Well gals, tonight we’re seizing the moment!
A night out every once in a while doesn’t have to be a source of anxiety for you, but just in case it is, here’s your ultimate guide to getting yourself in the mood for a night out without flaking on your mates.*
First of all, you can get started with this playlist…
Find the joy in getting ready
Nothing quite beats the showers you have when you’re getting ready for a night out. For me, a shower before a night out is like a military operation. Hair wash, hair mask, shave, balm, hair dry, essential oils, lotions & all sorts of potions…
If you’re still wondering if you’re up for it, the least you can do is get up and shower to see how you feel afterwards. Yes, that means getting out of your PJs you little tinker.
What I found best was to use ‘holiday smells’ (think coconuts, lime and suntan lotion) and citrus scented products to put me in good spirits. Bergamot, mandarin and orange all make fantastic mood boosters and I absolutely guarantee that you’ll – at the very least – feel great about yourself after using them, even if the idea of socializing is making you tick.
Your body is a temple and the process of getting ready for a night out is a ritual. Revel in yourself. Use your favourite shampoo, start early so you don’t feel rushed, do a facemask 15 minutes before so that you can easily scrub it off in the shower. Use this time to elevate your mood, treat yourself with kindness and forgive yourself for feeling a little blue.
Wear something that makes you feel unreal
My last post about how to ditch the ‘jeans and a nice top’ code will give you a few tips on finding something that makes you feel amazing on a night out.
Sod asking what everyone else is going to wear, focus on yourself for once. All you need to know is what bars you’ll likely be attending to figure out what outfit would be appropriate. From there on, it’s up to you.
This whole outfit was kindly gifted from Pretty Little Thing. I prefer to cover the tops of my arms so finding a dress with sleeves was a total blessing! Wearing a red dress is a power move, there’s not one person in the land who wouldn’t feel incredible in this silky smooth dress. I paired it with rose gold heels (again, from PLT) to compliment the luxe feel and finished off with a spritz of YSL Black Opium.
Surround yourself with good vibez only
It’s easy to get lost in a big group of friends on a night out, so confide in just one or two of your friends about your reservations and anxiety. They’re sure to understand and help support you – we live in a time where there’s more mental health awareness than ever (yeah, ok, we have a long way to go) but your friends are likely to completely get where you’re coming from.
Make sure to ask them that they personally introduce you to a few new people, if you’re not confident enough to start small talk over pre-drinks. This will help massively when it comes to socialising within the group.
Don’t forget snacks
The issue with being an anxious girl on a night out/at pre-drinks is that we often fiddle with everything. We can’t sit still. That’s why, if we’ve got a drink in our hands it will go – fast! We don’t even realise we’re doing it. That said, make sure you’re A) lining your stomach with a big meal before going out, B) chewing gum instead of drinking to keep yourself occupied.
Take as many selfies as you heckin’ want
Where did this whole ‘don’t be behind the camera, be in the moment‘ mantra come from? I mean, I’m going to Revs De Cuba not on a gap year pal. Can everyone just calm down?
Find a blank wall (not a bedroom door, please) and pose til your heart’s content. Who cares if your insta story is 10 tiles too long – it’s someone else’s choice if they want to watch the whole thing. Don’t ever feel ashamed for sharing the fact you like your outfit/you’re having a good time! These are the sort of feelings you need to nurture and hold onto.
Remember that you can go home at any time you want
One you’re out, you don’t have to stay out. If you just show your face that’s fine. At least you gave it a good go and showed your friends that you care.
Most of the time when I think ‘I’ll just show my face‘ I end up staying out for the rest of the night, because you just have to trick yourself into getting beyond that first pain barrier of anxiousness.
Clear your bed before you leave
There’s nothing quite like the sheer horror of coming home from a night out only to realise you left all your make up and potential outfits on your bed before you left. It’s too late. You’ve face planted the bed and in the process you’ve probably cracked your setting powder. The spins have set in and there’s no going back, you just need to focuse on trying to fall asleep before you fall out of bed.
*Don’t worry I do it too.
I should probably finish off this by saying, yes I am a flakey so-and-so. There are times that you will feel the need to cancel. I get that. But there will always be times when you’re on the fence and you need a little helping hand. That’s exactly what this piece is for. Good vibez only here, no judgement.
If, like me, you fancy a night out but you need a little empowerment/kick up the bum to stop watching Brooklyn 99 and leave the house – give it a go and let me know how you get on. I expect to be tagged in a photo of you at 2am with cheesey chips.
Have a great night!