You’ve got holes in your jumper – an FAQ

I swear to god, you can’t wear distressed clothing in the company of anyone over the age of 25. The constant reminders, bad puns and unoriginal jokes get boring after the first five times. Alas, the world is full of simpletons so I thought I’d put together a little FAQ for us all to swerve the banal comments.

Where did you get that jumper from, it’s full of holes!?
This jumper is from HotMess! and I’m honestly in love with it. My boyfriend got it me for Christmas after seeing me eyeing up their Yeezy-esque range. Despite being covered in holes, it’s a great quality jumper and it’s made in the UK. It washes really well and if anything, it’s actually got softer with time.

Do you think you’re Yeezy or something?
Yes I do.

Arent you cold!?
No, its a jumper. If I was I’d layer up, but thanks for your concern.

You do know you can see your bra through the holes right?
God forbid! A bra strap? How will I face the outdoors again. THE SHAME.

Think about it this way, if society is going to enforce women to wear bras, then charge us unfathomable amounts for the privileged of wearing them – why shouldn’t I show off a slight bit of the material I paid for? Beside, why ya looking pal!?

Look at those rips in your jeans. Did you fall over?
Well, yes I did actually. I slipped on wet leaves and went smack bang on my knees. RIP Topshop Jamies! Luckily, the girls at work egged me on to cut the other leg and I’m please to say the operation was a success.



Should we be wearing ripped jeans anymore?
The one fair argument I see against distressed clothing is that there are hundreds of low-paid workers grafting to create cheap clothing, which we simply rip into for fashion and throw in the bin when we get bored.

I can’t argue that some brands do practice poor sourcing and don’t look after their factories. However, I would be willing to make a tenner bet that the people making this point still shop at Primark and other guilty retailers. No shade, it’s just extremely hard to avoid!

The argument of ethical fashion certainly doesn’t revolve around ripped jeans and whilst your point is valid, you need to be thinking a little broader to get your answer on this one!

Are you trying to be a punk?
You can’t help but think about the punk movement when it comes to ripped jeans. They started it after all (blame them). Ripped jeans were originally a sign of anarchy. It was a pretty bold move to tear up something you’d spent money on and it was a way of mainstream rejecting consumerism.

How ironic that it’s now super trendy.

Can you not afford new jeans?
I shop in Aldi. What do you think, fam?

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  1. March 1, 2017 / 3:53 pm

    I’m not quite sure why people feel the need to question other people like this, but I really love the answers to your FAQ! I think that what people choose to wear is a personal choice and it’s just really not anyone else place to comment on or question that choice.

  2. March 1, 2017 / 4:18 pm

    Well I’m way over 25 (I’m 57), and i wouldn’t wear holes in ANYTHING!

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 1, 2017 / 4:27 pm

      Surely age has nothing to do with it? Look at Baddie Winkle, nothing stops her :).

  3. March 1, 2017 / 4:56 pm

    I have a jumper with so many rips it’s hardly even there! And I’m 42! Enjoyed this post a lot!

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 2, 2017 / 9:38 am

      Yesss kweeeeen!
      Distressed clothing is for everyone.

  4. March 1, 2017 / 5:33 pm

    haha i also love my own holey jeans and to be honest having kids i cant afford to replace my clothes as much as id like

  5. March 1, 2017 / 9:44 pm

    Hahahah. YES. I love this! I am all for holey jumpers & distressed jeans (even if it’s not on purpose) Your knee looks sore though! Ouch!

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 2, 2017 / 9:37 am

      Omg Sarah it was :(((((! I’m just so clumsy, I fall over ALL THE TIME.

  6. March 1, 2017 / 11:16 pm

    Haha oh the sarcasm gurl I heart you. I actually love distressed clothing and it made me laugh when your response to the question that asked if you were Yeezy was ‘yes’ .

  7. Hannah Latoya
    March 2, 2017 / 9:05 am

    I love the jumper you are wearing, it does look very good and warm for the winter x

  8. March 2, 2017 / 10:06 am

    I don’t see why people would question others clothing choices. I’m not a fan of ripped jeans or holes in the jumper but I’d never question those who wear them x

  9. March 2, 2017 / 10:37 am

    I love your answers to the FAQs, as you’re happy and comfortable I say 🙂

  10. March 2, 2017 / 10:49 am

    Hmm, I’m not sold on the jumper, it looks like you borrowed it from a tramp, but you don’t look like a tramp you pull it off! Me – I would look like I’d chucked it in the tumble dryer on the wrong setting.

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 2, 2017 / 10:03 pm


  11. March 2, 2017 / 11:08 am

    HAAHAH! i love this post! so so relatable! I saw distressed jumpers and tops in Primark and really wanted to get one but couldn’t find one in my size!

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 2, 2017 / 11:24 am

      Oh Primark are doing them now? Flipping heck, they will be everywhere before noon!

  12. March 2, 2017 / 12:17 pm

    Love this. I love ripped jeans but my Nan always comments on them, asking if I’d like her to sew them up for me, drives me mad. Jo x

  13. March 2, 2017 / 12:28 pm

    It looks great on you! “Do you think you’re Yeezy or something?” – “Yes I do.” – hahaa, love it.

  14. Dannii
    March 2, 2017 / 4:56 pm

    Haha this did make me laugh. It sounds like some of the things that my Nan would come out with.

  15. March 2, 2017 / 7:30 pm

    I don’t like ripped jeans but I love jumper with holes. They are edgy. Loved your responses.

  16. March 2, 2017 / 9:50 pm

    I love this, so funny! I really like the jumper too, but I guess I’m probably too old!!

  17. March 3, 2017 / 1:24 am

    Hahaha!! Lol this is SO funny. I love hearing “did you pay extra for those rips?”

  18. March 3, 2017 / 7:58 am

    I giggled through this entire read! Personally I love the jumper however I don’t own any with holes.

  19. March 3, 2017 / 4:34 pm

    I say where what you want! The only time I bin my jeans is if the hole is in the crotch area haha

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 3, 2017 / 7:28 pm

      This happens to me a lot because Topshop joni jeans are weak af and I sit like a man all day.

  20. March 3, 2017 / 5:49 pm

    haha this was a great post! Good little giggle! I don’t own any distressed tops but I will definitely be turning a pair of my black skinnies into ripped dreams soon as they are getting quite old!

    • Jess - Actual Philocalist
      March 3, 2017 / 7:27 pm

      It’s the perfect way to update old jeans! Bit of Dylon and some rips – jobs a good en!

  21. March 3, 2017 / 8:42 pm

    My parents always commented when wore ripped jeans lol. I think you should wear what you want and ignore those that don’t have anything nice to say.

  22. March 3, 2017 / 9:20 pm

    I love this post! Your supplies are so funny and sarcastic, and they made me chuckle. I love the ripped jeans by the way! X

  23. March 4, 2017 / 2:00 pm

    This is hilarious, I love ripped jeans still x

  24. March 4, 2017 / 7:27 pm

    This post is hilarious! I don’t get why some people have to be so judgy on other people’s fashion choices.